Lasts and Firsts
Rarely in our lives are we conscious of the transition between lasts and firsts.
We may not remember:
The last day of childhood summer.
The first time we stepped into the ocean.
The last time life was “normal” before an injury.
We often can’t recognize lasts when they're happening.
Others, we mark with a ceremony.
The last day of school culminates in graduation.
The last musical is celebrated with flowers.
The last breath of a loved one is honored by a funeral.
When done right, a ceremony initiates us into a new identity—a first.
The last day one is a boy becomes the first he is a man.
For me, 2025 was a year of lasts.
With my wife expecting our first child, I was more aware of what would never be the same.
I did my best to honor:
The last vacation out of the country.
The last road trip free and expansive.
The last birthday before being a father.
As time got closer, the lasts increased.
Last date night without a child.
Last gym session without a care how long it takes.
Last Christmas, just the two of us.
Last moments not having to put someone else's life above our own.
And then…on January 4th, came the ceremony and initiation that is labor.
My wife gave birth at home to a healthy, beautiful baby boy.
And just like that, my lasts turned into firsts.
First time seeing our son.
First baby sneeze.
First walk down the block as a family.
First day back to work as a new Dad.
I heard that when you have a child, you see the world fresh through their eyes. What was once routine becomes new again.
I look forward to many firsts in the coming years.
Contemplation
Are you in a year of lasts or firsts?
If it's lasts, how can you be more present and honor the endings?
If it's firsts, how can you open your mind and let go of old programming on how things should be?
Of course, life isn’t so binary. We are always in cycles of lasts and firsts, yet one is likely more present.
If you can’t tell, or it feels like you're living the same year over and over again—that’s a sign your soul needs growth.
Do something about it.
Seek a coach.
Find a retreat.
Shake up what's normal.
If we don’t die to who we were, we will never know who we’re meant to become.
As I shared in my post Meeting My Guru, the idea of fatherhood has been my greatest teacher.
I'm grateful to have finally crossed that threshold.
Thank you for being here with me.
First picture with our son, Rowan.